The Tongue of A Broken Zipper And A Successful Marriage

They are designed to make things come together. They work in concert to make the face of fashion a world-wide triumph in good looks. They keep us all from suffering a mountain of embarrassment. Zippers!
Who would have thought this little item could mend so many things, including marriages or married life. That is of course… when they work.

The tongue of a zipper – that little flappy part that pulls it all together – that brings both sides together is very much like that of a successful marriage. Like marriage, it rests at the top and the bottom of the garment of life like the ups and downs of married life. When it is down, it exposes a lot things that you may or may not want to come out or be seen. When it is up it keeps things where they are supposed to be and in proper order. It’s not the all important matter in married life that we discuss what those things are right here right now, but rather that they are in fact contained in a working relationship that defines what a successful marriage is all about.

When I originally thought of this concept to write about, I was actually standing in a short line at the dry cleaners with a pair of pants that had a broken zipper. I recently lost a little weight (thank you… thank you, your kind praises are greatly appreciated) and of course that led to the digging out of some of the old wardrobe items.

Wouldn’t you know it, the very pair of pants I pulled out of the set aside to wear later pile had a broken zipper. So I take them in for counseling.

Anyway, as I am waiting my turn to describe my problem and wondering just how the zipper ended up broken in the first place, I started the ramblings in my mind about married life and how it turns out to be, metaphorically speaking of course, like a broken zipper and how that relates to a successful marriage.

The zipper itself was well in place for holding both sides of the affair as it was designed to, it was only the tongue part that you pull on that was causing the problem… it was missing… so often as it is in a marriage.
The marital tongue has a tendency to control the bad side of the relationship more than the good side. So, with a fair warning… you have to remember that when it comes to zippers whether it is the ups or downs in your married life… mind your tongue! After all, when it is working correctly it is the essence of a successful marriage… a perfect fit.

Yes, I did get the zipper in my pants repaired and they look and fit just great. All I have to do now is maintain the weight with proper diet and exercise and the tongue in my head like the one on my zipper will bring both sides of our relationships together, improve my better looks and make a statement for both fashion and morality.

That little flappy thing of a tongue on a broken zipper can make or break the relationship in your wardrobe just like the controlling arm in a successful marriage, you absolutely need it to pull both sides together.

Don’t wait until things get so out of hand and broken that you put the good things of your marriage aside until you have to take them in to be repaired. Check your tongue often and make sure it is doing what it is supposed to be doing.

A Friend in Business and Life… Always,

-Lon-

Marriage

It’s marriage and money tips time.
Time once again to suck it up, stick to your guns, grab the reins and hold on.
It is reported the only 58% of Americans track their spending against a monthly budget according a Bankrate.com survey.

But why go thru all that hassle when it would be far more convenient to not only be prudent with your money and finances. How you ask? Rank in the business world with your own finances. You can be a part of a business that pays you 100% commissions. A business of your own.

As for your marriage, what makes this year different from those of the past. Well, for one thing the severity of commitment. You have committed to a good deal of time in analyzing your current spending versus income in order to find ways to fine tune it by tracking your progress and making adjustments.

For your marriage and money tips to take hold, here are some ways to get you and your spouse started.

You need to put together a comprehensive list of all your payments that you must make on a regular basis.
This would be a lot more manageable if you had just a little more something coming in monthly to handle those payments. This is where the Empower Network could help you with those marriage money tips.

Next, track your day-to-day spending for at least a week. Use a system that works for you; a spreadsheet, an app like Xpenser, Pennies or Cashish or just the old-fashioned pen and paper to keep a daily record. When you’ve been married for any length of time, you learn to value this marriage money tip.

Marriage and money tips mean that the more precise you are, the clearer the picture you’ll get of where your money goes and can open a profit window of opportunity when you have a business that is very easy and simple for you to use when you blog daily, tell others and make money.

Other great marriage and money tips come in the form of great relationships, in fact some legendary ones.

Finally, examine those lists to separate your needs from your wants and start trimming the wants.
It’s very easy to do with something as small as cutting back on entertainment expenses for example. Keep in mind this is only until you have brought your spending in line with your income.

In case you’re at the point to where this is not balancing out for you, here’s another marriage money tip.
Take a closer look at your needs to see if there are other ways to reduce those costs. Something like going to the grocery store, where over spending can be an unconscious spending act as you trip up and down those food laden aisles.

With marriage money tips and goals in mind, you won’t have to spend a lifetime making those kinds of adjustments. Life and your marriage is meant for living and enjoying.

When you become financially secure in your marriage, this year can be very different for you because you’ve taken the steps necessary to improve your life by taking a closer look at what can help you the most in your current situation.

Much success in your marriage, your business and your life.

A Friend in Business and Life…Always,

-Lon-

Married and F.O.G……

If you have ever stood on a hill in or other high point in San Francisco and looked out at the San Francisco Bay and seen the Golden Gate bridge as the fog came rolling in, you know it’s quite a sight to behold! If you haven’t…put it on your bucket list. One of those truly awe- inspiring wonders of nature that really puts things in perspective.

Marriage is very much like that in the respect that it’s a lifetime of ebbing and flowing of the various stages of FOG between a man and a woman.
I call it FOG…Falling or Fallen Out of Grace… because of the way it rises, lowers, covers and gets into and around everything it touches. Fog itself is a force of nature that at times can be very scary when you’re in the midst of it. Just like the trials and tribulations you will go through in marriage…they come and go and it only lasts for a time.

Being married does take some effort and then there are some things you just can’t control. But one thing you should never do is to just give up because there’s a fog about or all around you. Always be looking for the other side. You may have heard the saying…”never give up…you may be being prepared for the greatest thing about to happen in your life”. Don’t let a little fog stop or slow you down. That’s why you have each other…to withstand the perils of weather, marriage and life.
Falling out of grace is a simple matter of the loss of trust and security. And just like most everything in life, it can be overcome and made right. It just takes a strong lantern (commitment from you)…with an anti-fog beam of security to see your way through the fog. It’s been 30 plus years and she still says I’m always in a fog!

Everyone falls from grace almost on a daily basis. Not saying please or thank you or treating your spouse in a non-favorable manner just to name a few. These certainly aren’t end of the world things that will scar you for life or ruin your marriage, but they are a step in the direction of causing a shroud or blanket of fog to come over you and your marital situation and therefore leading you to unknowingly fall out of grace over the very simplest of things that can separate that tie that binds you and yours.

Are you a fair weather person? Do you live and hope always to not have to deal with the fog in your life? Just remember for you… bitterness can be an acid that will eventually destroy it’s own container.

Falling out of grace, just like regular ‘ol earthly fog, will in time come to pass.
Stay in the battle…don’t be afraid of the fog in your life. You have character and remember…Character is what we are in the dark (or in a fog), what we are when we are alone.

But also remember…that is the essence of marriage…you’re not alone!

Marriage is like that beautiful sight across the San Francisco Bay. There’s the strength of the pillar of the Golden Gate bridge standing steadfast against, with, by and for the fog. The fog of falling out of grace, if you’re high above to where you can look down… makes for a pretty neat looking picture in your life. Your thoughts and actions are sometimes thin and wispy and flow with the breeze and at other times it can come in great billows like the rolling tide. It’s how you navigate it. How you keep your low beams on and not turn on the bright lights to attract what will be reflected right back at you, causing you more trouble.

Stay the course. Man the helm as it were. Don’t let a little FOG (falling 0ut of grace) obscure the beauty of your bridge (marriage).

Lon

 Have you noticed that when you see a person walking at what seems like a rather brisk or even fast pace, you have a certain amount of respect for them…especially if they are smartly dressed and carrying a brief case or clip board?
Why is that? Are they on some sort of special mission that sets them apart from the rest of us? Did they just get good or bad news?
We don’t even entertain the thought that they could just simply be running a little late! Or at the very least…that is the one and only excuse we manage to muster for the occasion that would make sense to us.
I was watching this person as he came in from the outside, strolling down a rather long hallway and there were several people going in the opposite direction and to everyone he encountered, he gave a hearty greeting to which a few were startled by….yet surprisingly they responded.
That is when I noticed that the person doing the greeting was not walking at that pace out of any particular necessity of being late or for that matter…anything at all. That was his normal stride and disposition. He did not appear to be out of sorts, his mind not being on other things…it just seemed to be his way of taking on the world.
It was like watching a scene from a movie or a dream where you are in a physical position to see the comings and goings of the scene. He did not speak to me directly, but every bit of the air of sophistication and intent came over me when he passed by me.
That’s when I came to the conclusion that a certain amount of authority came with that swagger. To those he passed, from him…it was like a small zap of electricity or a lightening bolt of power that was transferred to those he greeted. It wasn’t an overwhelming or thunderously booming kind of greeting. It was, in fact however, a little more than the normal or usual tone that you would expect from strangers greeting each other in a semi crowded hallway.
Point being though is that whether intentional or not, the pace, the stride, the dress and the greeting appeared to be designed to command a certain amount of respect and at the same time give back to the person receiving the greeting, a like kind of authority, respect and empowerment.
I could see what looked like an initial bit of shock from the greet-ee, turn very quickly into a feeling of warmth and sincerity. That feeling of them being acknowledged gave way to a response that, in a rather pleasant way, seemed to shock the person giving it…”did those words come out of my mouth”?
My…my, how such a person can wield that kind of power with a simple greeting or smile upon another person! Can you imagine!…the kindness of strangers.
A slight detour from the regular ramblings on marriage, but in the vane of walking down the aisle with a life partner, the amount of authority and empowerment that gets shared between the two is what can sometimes define the situation that in my case has lasted 30 plus years. Hmmmm…is that why the walk down the aisle meant to be slow?

Where did the time go?
Yeah, time flies…but who’s the pilot?
Thirty plus year years ago, I (like you) started a journey to a new and wonderful adventure. It was almost like a vacation as far as planning, scheduling and arranging things in my life to be at a certain place at a certain time with a certain person. Getting married…tying the knot…jumping the broom…putting on the ball and chain. (I’m sure there are more and better descriptions of wedded bliss).
Just like planning a vacation, part of the scheme is that of..”where do you want to go…how are you going to get there…who are you traveling with”?
So many choices (mates) of places to go…so many people to be with. You know where you want to go, but making the choice of who that “who” is going to be, well, you’re not going to find that in a travel book or brochure or flyer you get in the mail or even in an email. (Although theses days the invitation for finding a mate is being delivered in cyber space!)
It’s the sight connection that really seals the deal. But not necessarily eyesight. By sight I mean all the senses to include a great many of the emotions that we go through on a daily basis. The ups and downs of life. The good and the bad. Really it’s more of a coming to a realization. You know…the moon and stars shine brighter, the planets are in perfect alignment…everything is just right and you feel real good about all that is going on around you. You even like the person that chose you as a mate.

 I guess really the “sight” part would be what we call the minds eye. Everything looks, sound and feels good in your minds eye…you manage to solve any and all of your problems in your minds eye…the world is a perfect place in your minds eye…and so is choosing this person you think you want to spend the rest of your life with!

Now making plans for a lifetime vacation takes a great deal of preparation. If marriage is to be that vacation, you’d better plan your flight into matrimony with full flaps up. You will need that to get that extra little bit of thrust to get you off the ground and into the clouds.
So you’ve made your reservations and when the time comes, you make your way to the airport of life. You check in and get your assigned station and begin to wait for particular your take-off to love and happiness. Hurry up and wait!

Time to contemplate.  In your minds eye, as noisy and bustling as things are around you at that time, you manage to find peace, comfort and a bit of solitude. Enough time to go through the entire gambit of emotions of …”am I doing the right thing”. What have I forgotten to do, to check for…where am I going…what am I doing here…is this really the right thing to do? On one hand those fears fill you quickly and only for a brief moment because you know that have thought this through, and yet on the other hand, you’re filled and thrilled at the prospect at this new adventure of going off into something you know entirely nothing about. It’s further confirmed as those bright eyes that stare back at you with the same anticipation for not only being together…but being together completely at the beginning. The one thought/same thought process.

Your flight has been called and you walk down the aisle to forever together, life is good.

After you to leave the terminal, board the plane, you do as I did (still do) take a quick look into the cockpit to see if you can see the pilot! I guess, just making sure I’m not alone.

You’re on board. This is the commitment. You strap in and get ready for the ride of your life.
As you taxi past the windows and buildings that represent your old life and past, you know those are the things that you are leaving behind.
But you also know that you will re-visit some of them and return to certain others on more than one occasion (you’re not giving up everything entirely)… and with that you are comforted with the thought that this marriage thing just might fly!

“Love is like a cloth being unfolded”.

It’s full of carefully placed twists and turns that when unfolded, reveals a wide open natural space that anything you can imagine can be held.

It’s not the size of the cloth that’s important…it’s the fact that there really  is a space for everything and anything.
The folds themselves could represent the lines or paths you are to follow in your life. They could represent the people that you will come in contact with and define your future.

But mostly, when it comes to Love, the folds are the areas of your life that represent companionship, trust and security…the basis for human survival.

Thirty plus years ago, there came a great transformation in my life that began with the putting in place or putting in order the plans for a life of being responsible for another person.

Once you get past the…”it would be great to spend the rest of my life with”…syndrome, and you find the right person, the folds of your life take on a whole new meaning. (bet you didn’t even know you had folds did you?!)

After falling in and out of love (let’s just say…for several times to keep the math simple) you realize that’s there is  more to life  than just the pure pleasure of the company of another person by your side. There’s that responsibility factor again. The real world lump in your throat, the tingle in your stomach, the thing that makes your heart beat a little faster with an unexplainable fear that you are responsible for the care and well being of someone that you have put all your trust, hopes, dream and desires in. A person that when you hurt them or they hut you by an insane act of stupidity, you can’t help but wonder “how can this be”…”is this real?”.
It’s all tucked away in those folds of the “cloth of life”.

If you’ve ever seen or peeled an onion yourself and noticed its layers…that’s what love is like…just one layer upon another…pretty uniform in a lot of respects, and … altogether are the things that make the whole. Good form, good symmetry…onions, you know…they makes things taste good and occasionally give you heartburn!

A folded cloth can be like an onion as far as concealing all the things that make it a bundled package, with the exception that the folding doesn’t necessarily stop.

You make the folds according to what you treasure. There’s a purpose for the folds. Like when you fold a handkerchief to a point so that it sticks out of the breast pocket of your suit completing the look…or when you put away a cherished memento of a lost loved one for remembrance and safekeeping…baby’s first dress or maybe your spouses wedding gown.

You don’t just pick these things up and shake them to see what’s inside…you carefully un-fold them, maybe even following a certain order to reveal what’s inside.

This is what love and marriage is all about. The very reason(s) for creating the folds is to keep…to protect…to preserve….so that when you pull your life out of the drawer of reality every once in a while and you take the time to examine a corner of it…you not only do so with great care…but also with a great respect, for the one that shares and shapes the folds that make your life together.

-Lon-

You’re full of gas!

Full of gas filled tubes and lights that glow much differently than what you’re used to…Radios of the past offer me a glimpse into why my marriage has lasted so long.

If you ask her, she’ll probably say….”yeah…he’s like the tubes alright…not what makes the radio work…just the full of gas part!”
Isn’t she lovely.

Like my little friends full of tubes and wires…there are things in our past (history) that were meant for pure pleasure. Though many were mass produced, there were also many that were truly hand made to enhance not only the quality of sound for which they were designed, but to look and feel like fine pieces of furniture.

These items graced mansions and country homes, apartments and garages, parlors and barber shops and kitchen tables with their own unique brand of character that made them not only good looking as a keepsake, but made their owners feel a certain amount of elegance, a certain amount of power and authority while at the same time made them a part of every other human beings joys, pains, sorrows and delights whether next door or a whole world away. The safety and security of marriage is a lot like that.

The woodwork was exquisite. The care and craftsmanship was divine. Much like the solidarity of a good relationship. For the day and time, the sound was very soothing. These are the kinds of things that made you wish you were a part of that era. Makes you wish that time was now. Remember how you first met?

Sure we have the best and the greatest of our world today…but even the most savvy tekkie can appreciate something that just makes you wonder what could have been. After all, she did have fine curves, a distinct sound about her and a certain radiance and charm.
Before you go off on that tangent of me likening my marriage to an old radio…well, you have your pet names for the one that makes you happy, let’s just say I have mine!

These wonderful pieces of furniture were the true source of mans imagination and subsequently…his freedom!
When one is free to love, think and dream…one is safe…the world as he knows and understands it…is safe.
The woman I married makes me feel safe.

-Lon-

Marriage Problems…Bite Me!

It all started a few years ago with a man, a woman, an apple and a snake.

Well actually the saying “bite me” derived in recent history, but the result is the same.  It comes down to communication in marriage. He said…she said.”

Just one of the many trials and tribulations of men and women. To find out more about having a happy marrige click here.

Not thinking. Well, not thinking …in the moment. A marriage moment

See….she has a grand idea that all is well and he …just flat out is… not thinking. Now add to the mix the deceptor…the wrangler that instigates and you have…what is marriage.

Now let’s not blame it all on a little ‘ol sneaky snake. The are many many other temptations that fit this little scenario…and that’s what we’ll be talking about here. Need some great marriage proposals click here.

Glad you stopped by.

-Lon-